She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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