MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
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