Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
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