Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Randomize
