I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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