Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
