My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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