the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I need water and some morals
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
