Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize