I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize