Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
