note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
