sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
