i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
handjob tips. give me some.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
