I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
