Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
