hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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