Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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