Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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