Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
