He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I cut my penus on the lid.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
