Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
