Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
