Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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