we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
