i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
