Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
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