no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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