That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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