I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
