I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
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