Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
