I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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