Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
