I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
