It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
