What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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