i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
