Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
