I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
