Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Banned from zoo.
Again?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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