"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
