I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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