even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
