Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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