He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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