I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
and she was petting her beer can
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
