I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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