okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
