This house was built for laser tag.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
