We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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